Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Hooray for Bollywood!

The other day I caught some of an amazing Indian film on Ghanaian TV. I don't now the name of it, but it was definitely a must-see sensation.

I tuned in somewhere in the middle of the film, just in time to see several Chuck Norris- style action scenes fired off in rapid succession. Black leather jackets, big 80's hair, and white suits with big shoulder pads all punctuated the terrible kung-fu moves and garish sound effects in a number of cliche fighting locations; I think they started in the graffiti-covered streets, moved to a seedy bar, and then magically were transported into a rich palace.

As fighting scenes aren't particularly enthralling for me, I stopped listening and became engaged in a conversation with Hamida.

When I turned my attention back to the movie, there was a young woman and an old man and another leather jacket a la Grease. The pair were talking- something about a "time bomb"- and it was clear that the woman had forgotten her simple instructions and was babbling like a ditzy Dori fish.

Next thing I know, the pair is in a police station. The officer is asking them questions and its revealed that they held up a jewelry store.

Then they spot "their criminal boss," who informs them he's a police officer and that he is in love with the ditzy woman. She cries.

Then they cut to the best part of the Bollywood film- the musical numbers. The blessed couple is on a hill singing to each other, with women in colorful silks dancing in the background. The couple dances and sings in different picturesque settings, with the female lead inexplicably vanishing into thin air from time to time.

The whole scene resembled either the musical number that concludes "A 40-Year-Old Virgin" or else a music video, since the leads changed their outfits about 5 times during the one musical number.

And here I thought that was the finale and the movie was finished. But I was deceived- there was still plenty more bizarre fun to be had with this flick.

Some further scenes that caught my eye:
-A beautiful woman turns suicide bomber and straps a bomb to herself, threatening to blow up a palace.
- The lead man assumes an appearance akin to Rambo and goes on a machine gun rampage.
- A peppy song and dance routine that children perform for their parents, and their parents join in by doing the Funky Chicken.
- A hand-to-hand combat scene featuring a grunting man with an overwrought musculature a la Double Dragon on the original NES.

How did it end, you ask? I know you're on the edge of your seats...

The lead character drove his jeep through a gate and this single act appeared to make the palace explode.

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